Okay, so I got that book...The WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook: Holidays. Some of it is funny. So since I can't come up with much to post these days, I'll try to remember to post some daily tips from this.
So here is today's... and for the record I'm not recommending these tactics, simply passing them along...
HOW TO SILENCE A GROUP OF CAROLERS
* Turn out the lights: As soon as you hear or see the carolers coming down the street, douse the lights. A dark house may deter them from stopping, since they'll think noone is home. Turning out the lights belatedly- after they've arrived at your door- will send a strong message, but carolers are frequently determined!
*Turn up your music: W/out opening your door, play CDs at high volume. Speed metal and 1970s rock are likely to be in a different key then the carolers, who will be unable to stay in tune, become discouraged & depart. If you're listening to Christmas music, shut it off immediately , or they may be encouraged to sing along.
*Answer the door in a robe or towel: Embarressed the carolers may simply leave. Nudity (even partial) may offend them & make them unable to sing.
*Answer the door holding a telephone: Shout, "I can't hear you! There are carolers singing!" into the moutpiece until the carolers move on.
*Bribe them: Tell them you'd like to make a small donation & that you enjoy their singing from a distance.
*Request songs they won't know: The song repertoire is generally quite shallow. Good choices to stump the carolers include "Adam Lay Ybouden," "Riu Chiu," and "The Zither Carol."
*Send them to someone else: Say, "My friend over there really loves carols," as you point to another house.
1 comment:
book sounds like an interesting read. Heard about a cool book at Bunko last week it's called the little black book of style by nina garcia. miss you friend!
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